In the mid to late 90s, it wasn’t uncommon to see a movie like Ever After: A Cinderella Story or The Man in the Iron Mask do moderately well in theaters; costume dramas for people who don’t normally watch costume dramas. While this is a far cry from anything Merchant and Ivory, it’s a bit disappointing that you don’t see much of these movies anymore now that every other movie is not only animated, but also in 3-D. Though the movie came out only 12 years ago it seems strange that anyone would ever go to a movie that wasn’t loaded with pop culture references and celebrity cameos. Now the genre is split, you either get fluffy romances or self-important historical epics. The only way for a movie like this to gain any attention today would be to call it Jane Austen’s Cinderella.
Ever After bills itself as a kind of historical Cinderella and dispenses with nearly all the tropes of fairy tale: fairy godmothers, transpomorphic pumpkins, or talking rodents. Of all the adaptations I can think of (Disney’s Cinderella, Cinderfella, Cinderella and the Half-Blood Prince) all contain some sort of glass footwear, Ever After at least acknowledges the presence of a fur slipper like one in the Grimm version. But a rat-skinned shoe, though more historically accurate, doesn’t conjure a pleasant or altogether romantic image. The glass slipper stays.
Our story begins, as if to add legitimacy, as an old woman corrects the brothers Grim in their telling of Cinderella. That not only was she a real person named Danielle, but a direct descendent was now speaking to them from her home a post-Revolution castle.
This being an American-made movie set in France, all the characters speak in British accents. So a line like this one: “You wish me to go to a mosque?” threw me initially when I realized she was saying probably saying “mask.” Apparently in Acting 101, they teach you get a new accent by switching the vowels in certain words. Beyond this, the only indication we get that we are in France is the bad guy is named Pierre Le Pieu. Not that location is important to a story like this, though it keeps getting brought up that the ultimate punishment would be being sent to America, though it’s ironic that to many Red Staters today, the opposite would be just as big of threat.
This remains though, the only live-action fairy tale to feature Leonardo Da Vinci as comic relief. To get an idea how strange this is, imagine a 20th century adaptation of Snow White with Andy Worhol helping the two leads find love by showing them a 12-hour movie about a apple.
I am joint owner of this movie thanks to one of those cheapy boxed sets containing three or four movies linked only by a common actor. The other two movies in The Drew Barrymore collection are Never Been Kissed and Fever Pitch, both movies involving annoying characters, improbable miscommunications and baseball. Ever After only has one of these; and if you think it’s baseball, then you’re in for a long two hours.
One of the things that always bothered me about the Prince Charming character is he does next to nothing to get the girl. While the Prince Henry (just a shade more macho of a name than Charming) does do a little more than launching a kingdom-wide foot hunt, we also see him whining about marrying various foreign princesses and complaining about getting grounded in his gigantic castle. On second thought, maybe Prince Charming is a bit manlier. When the king orders him to take a bride, he must either find one in five days or one will be chosen for him. It seems even 16th century France isn’t immune to the How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days plotline.
